Monday, November 10, 2008


So, when it comes to certain areas, I think too much. I can see this pretty plainly, and several of my friends can too, so I don't think I'm wrong in saying that.

I think too much by trying to analyze every single little detail and possible outcome of my actions. This results in me doing things I'd rather not do, I worry about everything I do, meaning I'm normally not all that relaxed, and because of those things I don't act like myself. I don't actually have fun very often. Being serious is over rated. Seriously. What is better- laughing at yourself for doing something silly and having a ton of good times to remember, or trying to decide if you did the best thing and not really being able to remember having fun with your friends?

OKay, I can see that I think too much in some ways and that it's not good. My question now is, how do I not do that? It's honestly about all I know how to do right now.

I'm not sure how to stop thinking and just enjoy myself, and so now I'm thinking even more in trying to figure this out....perhaps, if I just ask myself whenever I find myself in a situation I'm tempted to analyze, "what would I do if I didn't think it through?" And I know that's not what I should follow every time, because sometimes first instincts aren't good, but perhaps it would be better than making myself choose the harder thing every time.

On another note, my NaNo isn't going too well. I have trouble simply sitting down and doing it. There's so many distractions. I'm at about 6,000 words right now, when I should be at around 17,000.


Kelly said...

Oh Mary, I think it's a gift and a curse. You're so amazing and wonderfully creative. I'm not so sure not thinking is necessarily the's thinking differently. Allowing yourself to relax, even if you're thinking. Essentially, I'm pretty sure we're saying the same thing. :) Can't wait to see you at Thanksgiving.

Mary said...

*nods* Yeah, I think that is what I was trying to say. :) Looking forward to seeing you too.

Stephanie said...

I think these are things in us that are either hard to change or almost impossible to change on our own. Ask the Lord to do the changing for you in His timing and teach yourself that it is okay not to think about certain things or to let them go. I do believe that life is more fun when you can laugh things off and I hope that the Lord will do that in your life for you! Peace to you as you work it all out! You three girls left at home might have to go out and have a fun day or night together! :)

Bekah said...

Hmmm. Maybe thats why you were in such a good mood Wednesday, you decided to have fun! But, I think your pretty fun all the time!